No, I haven't disappeared. Which is why you should be looking at the place I'm really blogging right now.
Silly French people.
Saturday, July 19, 2008
Friday, May 9, 2008
The letter at last
Arriving home late, overtired from so little sleep last night, sniveling from sinus congestion and raspy sore throat, I open the front door to Promising-White-Envelope-Hanging-From-Ceiling:
Bless my little wifie, she had found a letter (THE letter) from UHM in the mailbox and devised cleverly to surprise me.
In short, it says that I am accepted to the Master's program in Tropical Plants and Soils, that we will be moving to Hawaii in three very teeny-tiny months, that we hate(!) leaving all our lovely and most treasured friends here and will miss them tremendously and won't they please come with us.
Phone calls to parents, etc., etc.
We go out and celebrate. Sushi, naturally...
Bless my little wifie, she had found a letter (THE letter) from UHM in the mailbox and devised cleverly to surprise me.
In short, it says that I am accepted to the Master's program in Tropical Plants and Soils, that we will be moving to Hawaii in three very teeny-tiny months, that we hate(!) leaving all our lovely and most treasured friends here and will miss them tremendously and won't they please come with us.
Phone calls to parents, etc., etc.
We go out and celebrate. Sushi, naturally...
Monday, April 14, 2008
Analysis: Why I failed. (Part 2)
Driving home, I hear on NPR that Haitians are rioting because their food costs too much. I get home and see this on AlJazeera.net:
This makes me very sad. And along with feeling very bad for people who are starving, it makes me want to have a pity party for myself, and charge the National Science Foundation for the punch and chip dip. This brings me to installment 2 in my backlash at NSF for rejecting my grad school fellowship proposal.
You see, those two things I bolded in that paragraph up there are two things that are wrong with the world, and two major components of what I proposed to study with grant money from NSF. I still can and will, without NSF. I just really want to believe that a project like mine would be deemed worthy of being funded.
Here is my project in a nutshell: there's a plant called Jatropha curcas and it grows like a weed most anywhere in the world. Thailand, Guatemala, the Netherlands, California. It makes little fruits that are loaded with veggie oil. You press them, and voila! you have a diesel substitute, or fuel for cooking stoves or for lamps, or oil for making soap. In a poor, developing country in Africa, this can have tremendous potential. For a small, primitive village dependent on growing food to stay alive, there isn't often the luxury of excess cash to import expensive diesel fuel, and hence no advancement into mechanical power to pump clean water, improve agricultural productivity, etc. But if you could, say use your unproductive, infertile, outlying lands to grow your own fuel source, you might stop chopping down forests around your village (desertification) to collect cooking fuel, and you won't have to sacrifice your food-producing prime agricultural soils. I wanted to be able to study this in great and, above all, practical detail -- actually grow the stuff, quantify its yield on those outlying, non-food-producing, infertile soils, see if it could be done feasibly, and then share my findings. Very little research along these lines exists. Even uber-progressive Wageningen University recognizes this is ground-breaking stuff, and has an entire "programme" devoted to learning more about this plant and making sure the world knows about it. I can be part of that.
But not with the blessing of NSF. Because they think my project sucks.
What's the deal? Specifically, my rejection letter from NSF..."Extensive academic and practical experience have given you a solid foundation with which to undertake your graduate work. The choice of topic seems pedestrian, but was chosen, perhaps, to fit in at U. Hawaii destination."
First of all, seriously guys, that's a tad condescending. If you really wanted to insult UHM I guess you could have peed on their front lawn and posted a YouTube video to prove it.
And pedestrian!? I'll be the first to admit, and proudly, that my idea was very ordinary. I think a third-grader with more than a 30-second attention span could probably grasp the underlying logic. What's so wrong with that? Hey, NSF, perhaps you didn't catch the part about PEOPLE DYING BECAUSE WE'VE STARTED TO CONVERT ALL THOSE PRIME SOILS TO GROWING ETHANOL INSTEAD OF GROWING DINNER.
Okay then, let's see what projects are worthy of NSF bucks. End baby seal poaching? Invent solar-powered super cars? Stop all human conflict forever?
Nope. Lasers.
African lasers.
Yep, NSF is handing out a hundred-thousand smackeroos to promote biological application of lasers in the US and Africa. "Good luck growing that food, starving people; wish we could help you out with that, but we're too busy PLAYING WITH OUR LASERS."
Or take for example this gem: $36,322 to fund a workshop to help identify "the next set of grand challenges in biology and how they best can be met by plant research." What the heck? What about the challenge that I've identified and the research that I propose to best meet that challenge? (Perhaps if I apply for some workshop money to do some more talking about that challenge....)
Am I being too hard on NSF? Well here's the other reason they rejected me: "...the proposed plan of research needs more precise, and clearly thought out objectives and planning to be strengthened." Okay, let's look at the stated objectives of that brilliant African laser proposal. No joke, here they are:
A hundred thousand dollars? And my objectives needed refining?
Maybe what I'm saying is that it's time for a little honest, straightforward, ordinary-ness in the scientific community. Maybe hard science doesn't necessarily have to be hard, just be relevant. Poverty, hunger, basic humanity....these are the problems of today. Let's be real about them today.
And now please excuse me. I have some brown spots in my lawn to repair.
Food riots have erupted in countries including Haiti, Egypt, Cameroon, Ivory Coast, Senegal, Burkina Faso, Ethiopia, Indonesia, Madagascar, and the Phillipines in the past month....Prices in these countries for foodstuffs such as rice, wheat, sorghum and maize have doubled.....Causes of crisis range from financial speculation on food commodities, desertification, population increases, China and India's economic growth and use of grains to make biofuel.
This makes me very sad. And along with feeling very bad for people who are starving, it makes me want to have a pity party for myself, and charge the National Science Foundation for the punch and chip dip. This brings me to installment 2 in my backlash at NSF for rejecting my grad school fellowship proposal.
You see, those two things I bolded in that paragraph up there are two things that are wrong with the world, and two major components of what I proposed to study with grant money from NSF. I still can and will, without NSF. I just really want to believe that a project like mine would be deemed worthy of being funded.
Here is my project in a nutshell: there's a plant called Jatropha curcas and it grows like a weed most anywhere in the world. Thailand, Guatemala, the Netherlands, California. It makes little fruits that are loaded with veggie oil. You press them, and voila! you have a diesel substitute, or fuel for cooking stoves or for lamps, or oil for making soap. In a poor, developing country in Africa, this can have tremendous potential. For a small, primitive village dependent on growing food to stay alive, there isn't often the luxury of excess cash to import expensive diesel fuel, and hence no advancement into mechanical power to pump clean water, improve agricultural productivity, etc. But if you could, say use your unproductive, infertile, outlying lands to grow your own fuel source, you might stop chopping down forests around your village (desertification) to collect cooking fuel, and you won't have to sacrifice your food-producing prime agricultural soils. I wanted to be able to study this in great and, above all, practical detail -- actually grow the stuff, quantify its yield on those outlying, non-food-producing, infertile soils, see if it could be done feasibly, and then share my findings. Very little research along these lines exists. Even uber-progressive Wageningen University recognizes this is ground-breaking stuff, and has an entire "programme" devoted to learning more about this plant and making sure the world knows about it. I can be part of that.
But not with the blessing of NSF. Because they think my project sucks.
What's the deal? Specifically, my rejection letter from NSF..."Extensive academic and practical experience have given you a solid foundation with which to undertake your graduate work. The choice of topic seems pedestrian, but was chosen, perhaps, to fit in at U. Hawaii destination."
First of all, seriously guys, that's a tad condescending. If you really wanted to insult UHM I guess you could have peed on their front lawn and posted a YouTube video to prove it.
And pedestrian!? I'll be the first to admit, and proudly, that my idea was very ordinary. I think a third-grader with more than a 30-second attention span could probably grasp the underlying logic. What's so wrong with that? Hey, NSF, perhaps you didn't catch the part about PEOPLE DYING BECAUSE WE'VE STARTED TO CONVERT ALL THOSE PRIME SOILS TO GROWING ETHANOL INSTEAD OF GROWING DINNER.
Okay then, let's see what projects are worthy of NSF bucks. End baby seal poaching? Invent solar-powered super cars? Stop all human conflict forever?
Nope. Lasers.
African lasers.
Yep, NSF is handing out a hundred-thousand smackeroos to promote biological application of lasers in the US and Africa. "Good luck growing that food, starving people; wish we could help you out with that, but we're too busy PLAYING WITH OUR LASERS."
Or take for example this gem: $36,322 to fund a workshop to help identify "the next set of grand challenges in biology and how they best can be met by plant research." What the heck? What about the challenge that I've identified and the research that I propose to best meet that challenge? (Perhaps if I apply for some workshop money to do some more talking about that challenge....)
Am I being too hard on NSF? Well here's the other reason they rejected me: "...the proposed plan of research needs more precise, and clearly thought out objectives and planning to be strengthened." Okay, let's look at the stated objectives of that brilliant African laser proposal. No joke, here they are:
Specifically the objectives are: 1) Host an advanced research and learning institute by bringing together U.S. and African experts, post-docs, advanced graduate students, and other researchers, including HBCU faculty, and giving them a state-of-the-art, cutting edge view of important and exciting research directions; 2) Share information on new breakthroughs in the field; 3) Explore the commonality of interests and promote collaborations between U.S. and African researchers, with special attention to promoting women in the research enterprise; 4) Establish joint research projects among different participating Institutions.First, my stated objectives were way better and more specific than that. And second, to what do these objectives not apply?? Hog farming? Check. Sex research? Check. Hot-air balloon hobbyists? Check.
A hundred thousand dollars? And my objectives needed refining?
Maybe what I'm saying is that it's time for a little honest, straightforward, ordinary-ness in the scientific community. Maybe hard science doesn't necessarily have to be hard, just be relevant. Poverty, hunger, basic humanity....these are the problems of today. Let's be real about them today.
And now please excuse me. I have some brown spots in my lawn to repair.
Monday, April 7, 2008
Reason #1 to move to Fresno: the Isches
We spent the weekend at Isch Haus, painting a room for soon-to-be Baby Isch. The yellow turned out perfect! The house next door is tantalizingly up for sale, and will somebody please please please give us a Reason Number Two!!!!!
Baby-daddy
Thursday, April 3, 2008
Analysis: Why I failed. (Part 1)
So, a while back I applied for a grad fellowship through the National Science Foundation. I intend to go to the University of Hawaii at Manoa this fall to surf....ummmm... study tropical soil science and agriculture and hopefully, someday, get a master's degree, live out my days in a mud hut in Africa.
Now, for those of you who don't know (I didn't until I realized I wanted some money from them to go to school) NSF is a pretty cool organization. Here are some of the fun facts from their website:
1. Created by Congress in 1950 "to promote the progress of science; to advance the national health, prosperity, and welfare; to secure the national defense…"
2. Has an annual budget of $6.06 billion.
3. Funds ~20% of "all federally supported basic research conducted by America's colleges and universities."
Cool, I needed some dough.
Finally, a day rolled around in November 2007 when I--after what seemed hours-days-weeks-eons of laborious writing, thinking, reviewing my past, thinking, writing, looking into my future--finally produced something resembling an application for a fellowship to go to UHM, study this amazing plant called Jatropha curcas, and figure out how it could be better used in developing countries as a source of cost-effective, sustainable fuel for diesel engines, cooking stoves, lamps, and so on.
I submitted it to NSF, begged for some letters of recommendation from some of my favorite people in the world (a.k.a. the Cal Poly Soil Science Department), and waited.
And waited.
November to March is a LONG TIME.
Cruelly, on April 1, as I logged on to the NSF grad fellowship website, I saw the notice that the list of 2008 awardees was available for public viewing. I searched and re-searched the neatly alphabetized list about fifteen thousand times before I finally gave up, resigned to the fact that, no they hadn't just spelled my name wrong, I indeed was not one of the lucky ones getting that nice chunk of change. Suddenly, it wasn't going to be a walk in the park for me to leave my cushy California job to go be a student in Hawaii.
So where did I go wrong? I've been thinking about this a lot. I've got a few ideas, mostly having to do with 1) elitist schools, 2) the notion of good hard science today, and 3) the complexity of trying to mix respectable graduate work with a Godly attitude toward missions.
[to be continued]
Now, for those of you who don't know (I didn't until I realized I wanted some money from them to go to school) NSF is a pretty cool organization. Here are some of the fun facts from their website:
1. Created by Congress in 1950 "to promote the progress of science; to advance the national health, prosperity, and welfare; to secure the national defense…"
2. Has an annual budget of $6.06 billion.
3. Funds ~20% of "all federally supported basic research conducted by America's colleges and universities."
Cool, I needed some dough.
Finally, a day rolled around in November 2007 when I--after what seemed hours-days-weeks-eons of laborious writing, thinking, reviewing my past, thinking, writing, looking into my future--finally produced something resembling an application for a fellowship to go to UHM, study this amazing plant called Jatropha curcas, and figure out how it could be better used in developing countries as a source of cost-effective, sustainable fuel for diesel engines, cooking stoves, lamps, and so on.
I submitted it to NSF, begged for some letters of recommendation from some of my favorite people in the world (a.k.a. the Cal Poly Soil Science Department), and waited.
And waited.
November to March is a LONG TIME.
Cruelly, on April 1, as I logged on to the NSF grad fellowship website, I saw the notice that the list of 2008 awardees was available for public viewing. I searched and re-searched the neatly alphabetized list about fifteen thousand times before I finally gave up, resigned to the fact that, no they hadn't just spelled my name wrong, I indeed was not one of the lucky ones getting that nice chunk of change. Suddenly, it wasn't going to be a walk in the park for me to leave my cushy California job to go be a student in Hawaii.
So where did I go wrong? I've been thinking about this a lot. I've got a few ideas, mostly having to do with 1) elitist schools, 2) the notion of good hard science today, and 3) the complexity of trying to mix respectable graduate work with a Godly attitude toward missions.
[to be continued]
Things that distracted me from working today:
1. Tweaking my iGoogle page. My additions included Honolulu weather (rainy, 79) and an easy link to apartment listings on craigslist oahu.
2. This appearance of the word "pedestrian" in my denial letter from the NSF graduate fellowship program (more on that, maybe later, when I don't feel so......so.....stomach-clenched, run-over-by-a-truck).
Oh boy, glad UHM didn't see that.
Being on the receiving end of this word, my initial reaction was "low blow!!", soon replaced by "nice usage!!" I need to start slipping that wittily into conversation at every opportunity.
3. Really cool stoves that can run on Jatropha oil. Made by those Germans.
4. This flowchart Nathan sent me illustrating correct application of the "oh snap!"
2. This appearance of the word "pedestrian" in my denial letter from the NSF graduate fellowship program (more on that, maybe later, when I don't feel so......so.....stomach-clenched, run-over-by-a-truck).
Oh boy, glad UHM didn't see that.
Being on the receiving end of this word, my initial reaction was "low blow!!", soon replaced by "nice usage!!" I need to start slipping that wittily into conversation at every opportunity.
3. Really cool stoves that can run on Jatropha oil. Made by those Germans.
4. This flowchart Nathan sent me illustrating correct application of the "oh snap!"
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